Thursday, March 4, 2010

Not doing so well...

WARNING: This post talks about pregnancy (no, I'm not, unfortunately), OB/GYNs and the like. So if you're a squeamish type you might want to stop reading now. And yes lovely husband of mine, it's the kind of stuff you don't like talking about. ;)

Well, my miscarriage was three months ago today. Instead of channeling my anger into something productive by running it off I've more like stopped functioning a lot of the time. My focus is on my daughters and not on myself...seriously, when was the last time I got a hair cut? Put on full makeup? Got dressed in something other than jeans and a hoodie (except for church)?

I'm feeling a dilemma. I want to get pregnant...which totally isn't happening as quickly as I'd like (read: totally frustrated)...but I want to get in shape too. I found a program that helps you run a half-marathon on 8 weeks. It looks totally doable since I can already run and once I get into it I enjoy it. Ahhh...all that free time to think and listen to music as I run...or you know, watch the food channel while I run (whatever, it's torture but I do it). But it's too intense to do while pregnant, so if I got pregnant while doing it I'd be risking another miscarriage, I think. I stop trying to get preggers for a couple months and focus on the running? Or do I just keep trying for a baby and do the running after?

Sigh...I have an appointment in less than 2 weeks for that dreaded annual visit at the OB/GYN...I think I'm going to talk about it with her.


Christine Jensen said...

I would start the running and try to get prego...and just stop if you do get pregnant or think you are...that way you are getting your body healthy and you are focused on something else (instead of constantly stressing about not being pregnant..that can be so frustrating, I know).

Good luck with everything...running is a great distraction..I am training for the Wasatch Back Relay and a half at the end of May. I am loving all of the me time and how great I feel.

Rob said...

It sounds like you really want a baby so I would say stop running. Why not walk instead? You can still do that while pregnant or trying to get pregnant without harm or risk of a miscarriage.

Char said...

One thing I've learned after years and year of infertility is NOT to make future plans around the premise of whether or not I would be pregnant. DON'T PLAN YOUR LIFE AROUND "What if"!!! Do the running program and if you get pg, take your level down a bit. You can still run while pg. :) Best of luck to you with both adventures!!!